SPANKING FETISH.WHIPPINGS FOR PLEASURE AND CLEANSING; KNEELING FOR ORGASMIC COMPLETION, KNEELING FOR HOLY COMMUNION - TWO FORMS OF FORGIVENESS
I write a lot about spirituality, and I give what I call "The Empire Church" of 1800 years ago a hard time about all the lies they have told us. I'm still angry about all the lies. I can't believe that
people who were supposed to be guardians of the door to truth, that: "They did not enter, nor did they allow
anyone else to enter" the path to the holy citadel. (Gospel of Thomas)
But the churches of all dominations (strange word) do a lot of good stuff these days.
O.K. O.K. But I got to thinking the other night when I was on my knees, but not in what
we usually think of as a spiritual setting - I was thinking, "Hell, am I getting like those crazy
sermonizers who speak of holiness on Sunday morning, but need to be thrashed with a cane
like a cowering dog on Friday nights?"
Well, I don't want to be that kind of hypocrite ( I'll probably be a different kind of
hypocrite). But I think it's important to express the whole picture now.
I got spanked a lot as a boy; for example, when I was late for dinner.
And then after a while I got to like the spankings and felt a strange glow all through my body.
So I started showing up late for dinner on purpose.
And the feel of that aroused warm, strange glow has never left me.
And so sexually speaking I'm a sadomasocist. I like to have my ass whipped before or during
sex. And I like to give the occasional caning myself. Nothing too serious. Notrhing that leaves
marks for more than a day. But it's an obsession and almost but not quite a sexual necessity
for me.
There, I've said it. So now when I talk about mysticism or spirituality, you know I
really mean what I say.
Also, I don't think there are two worlds - a higher one of the spirit and a lower one of
the flesh. From what I have come to know, there is only one fabric of being. One energy of one
universe, whether you want to call it sexual, or spiritual, or mystical. There are not two
different worlds; there is only one.
It's how you focus your energy - too much up or too much down:
this can screw you up.
Sometimes I think you guys already know everything I'm talking about, that I'm behind
the times and the Christian world has moved on, gotten more evolved. Then I just read the papers
or watch CNN, and I think, "Holy shit! People still believe that bogus nonsense?"
Look, if the real world, the actual universe we inhabit were not enough - if the ground
of being was deficient in some way - I would not be giving anybody the bad news.
Honestly, I'm not cruel that way. I would leave everyone alone. If ignorance is bliss, be blissful.
And that would be fine and I would not interrupt.
BUT... we are living in the midst of a miracle, every day wondrous things happen, and
I know it, and it's possible to prove much of it.
There is no deficiency in this Cosmic Field we inhabit. Everything we touch is Spirit
and everything we touch is Flesh. And there are not two worlds; but only one.
Now I've had a bit of a different life. I was born in northern Ontario, and raised
on the north coast of Jamaica. And I was very lucky.
I was able to visit many of the world's shrines and sit still and absorb
the vibes in each place. I'm a good guitar player and that helped me get around, but
I also received financial gifts, so I don't expect or deserve any credit for what
I've done.
When I was a very young man of twenty, I started to be bothered by questions.
I couldn't shake myself loose from them, or I would have.
A basic question troubled me and I could not spit it out of my head. It was something
like, "Why is there beauty on one side of the coin, and ugliness on the other side of the same
coin.What is going on around here, what we are born into, as soon as we have eyes
don't we ask, "What was that?" if a bird flies over our infant's crib, or "What is this?"
looking at a tree or the eyes of a beautiful woman, and what eyes are not beautiful?
At any rate I started fasting while attending University, and I'd take
hallucinogens, and nothing helped.
And I was a very serious young man at the time, and I must have been
a real drag to be with.... Oh God, I was so serious! And this question was stuck in
my craw!
So I spent days and nights fasting, and focusing on, "What is this?
This hand, this leaf, this stone?"
And then one night, focusing with all my strength on,"In the beginning was the Word",
trying to comfort a girlfriend who couldn't stop crying, and who I didn't know how to comfort...
at the age of 23 I had the basic mystical realization, which is called fundamental.
But since, in the West, we have no structure to comfort real seekers,
real men and women on the Quest for the Holy Grail, a few words must be said.
We have no path of initiation.We seem to focus totally on sports or politics or the
obtaining of material goods, but we have no developed system of aid and
encouragement for those who have gone beyond the village gates,
and are seeking the bedrock experience.
This experience is like an implosion in the mind; all earlier
mental structures are annihilated, decimated into nothingness. It iscalled by many
names the world over: satori, kensho, samhadi, enlightenment, liberation, redemption -
realization - being raised from the dead. If it's an ultimate experience. There are
so many different paths, but only one absolute experience and experience of the
absolute.
Thank God for the Zen Buddhists! Because in Christian terms,
there was nothing and no way to explain my experience - and without help
from our friends - I would have been totally screwed! I was already
psychologically messed up because I was not prepared for the basic
identity change that is involved. And I had no idea how to fit
into society, so I left and built cabins deep in the bush.
And I guess I became something of a hermit.
Things have gotten slightly better in the past 30 years, but we still
have no basic system of spiritual initiation in place. And if we don't develop one,
a temple at the heart of the marketplace... we won't have to worry about terrorists:
our culture and civilization will die because of our own lack of volition.
For years self flagellation has been a way for religious pilgrims to
purify themselves. Around 1000A.D., there were groups called the flagellants,
who would whip themselves and drag crosses right through your village even in
daylight. They thought the end of the world was coming, and they knew they
weren't ready to meet their maker in their present sinful state. So they
would kneel and whip themselves to be cleansed
Kneeling before your love, because you feel guilt is a very similar
process. Sometimes a little begging is necessary; or a whipping might be
your due before in your own mind you deserve to be loved and forgiven
and granted absolution.
Punishment is forgiveness.
Kneeling before your love and getting your ass
caned as you perform sexual favors on her(him). Kneeling and whipping
yourself. to be cleansed before holy communion with the One who is
creating you.
Don't ask me why submission is cleansing
to the human psyche, but it is.
There's kneeling and there's kneeling. There's kneeling for
spiritual forgiveness, and there's kneeling. for sexual
acceptance:
.
. Either way, it seems like prayer.
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